Monthly Archive: January 2015

Mamachanic (Mom/Mechanic) Basic Auto Care – $60.00 Class

         I’m a ASE certified former VW mechanic and mother of two. I’d like to teach a class on basic car care- how to check your fluids, set your tires, install a spare tire instead of waiting three hours for AAA, check your filters, know what services you really need to keep your car on the right maintenance schedule and make it run forever.

          As a woman, I know how intimidating taking your car in for repairs can be. I’d like to teach basic car knowledge to anyone who wants to learn- men, women, new teen drivers. Give yourself some peace of mind, driving around in our Colorado winters by learning more about your vehicle.

CLASS DETAILS

Saturday, Feb 21 2015

01:00:00 PM

Price: $60.00

For More Class information or to Sign Up – Click here

So my awesome husband, who I swear is good at many things save driving, rear-ended someone this week. Luckily, he still drives a VW and he’s married to a “retired” Volkswagen mechanic.

Time to unlock the tool box and assess the damage. Fortunately, this is a job I can accomplish in my driveway. January isn’t exactly the best month to do some outdoor car repairs but I live in sunny Colorado where sometimes I score a 60-70 degree day.

So I started by tearing everything down to make sure there wasn’t hidden damage, make sure the adjuster covered everything, and to get a list of parts to order.

The list so far incudes: radiator, radiator support, AC condenser, right headlight, fan clutch and blade, upper radiator hose, bumper grill, and support bracket. All of which I can replace myself. The only thing I need to bring it to a repair shop for is to recharge the AC system when I get everything back together and maybe to double check the auto transmission fluid since I’ll lose a bit during the radiator replacement and VW doesn’t believe in tranny dipsticks.  Still kind of debating recharging the AC just yet since it is mid-January and I think making the hubby sweat it out a bit might improve his driving skills. 🙂

Plus I already broke a nail so he’s definitely in the dog house. Stay tuned for further progress.

“True he ain’t pedigreed, Sandy, there ain’t no better breed.

And he really comes in handy,

‘Specially when you’re all alone in the night

And you’re small and terribly frightened it’s

Sandy, Sandy who’ll always be there!”

“Sandy” Original Annie movie

           I am an extremely proud Colorado native. Born at St. Joe’s, raised in Lakewood, after a brief stint in Boulder, I’ve spent the last twenty years in Denver. I love Denver! We are one of only twelve U.S. cities to have all four major sports leagues- Avalanche, Rockies, Nuggets, and Broncos. I have season tickets to our lacrosse team the Colorado Mammoth. We have a pretty cool zoo, tons of discovery filled museums, not to mention the Rocky Mountains! We are currently one of the fastest growing cities in the nation. Over fifty thousand people moved here last year. I’m not one of those transplant hating natives. In my opinion, if you want to move here and contribute to our booming economy, more power to you. We were one of the first states to legalize marijuana and whether you partake or not, there’s no arguing the benefit of over forty three million dollars going to our Denver public schools in just the first six months of legalized weed. $43,000,000 that’s six zeros!

           We have tons of great concert venues from the Bluebird Theatre, the Ogden theatre, the Gothic theatre, Fillmore Auditorium…the list goes on. All the cool bands play here. Not to forget Red Rocks Amphitheatre, a naturally formed astounding place to hike, do yoga, catch a flick or swoon to Jack White’s latest. I had my high school graduation ceremony at Red Rocks, a special bragging point I tell my transplant friends. We’ve also become a great city to be a foodie in, with a multitude of new restaurants opening all the time and classics like Buckhorn Exchange and Cholon Bistro or any spot in Larimer Square to enjoy. I’m salivating just thinking about them. We are second only to Hawaii in having the most sunny days per year of all fifty states. Most days feel warmer in Denver because we are actually closer to the sun at one mile above sea level. ONE of the reasons for our nickname, the “Mile High City.”

     As a disgruntled angsty teen, I thought I’d flee Colorado without a check in my rear view mirror  but I’m a proud graduate of Denver Automotive and Diesel College now and there’s nowhere I’d rather live. Denver is a fantastic place to raise children. Our school break days are filled with fun and affordable excursions to Confluence Park to tube on the Platte River, to 16th Street Mall especially during the annual Zombie Crawl, cruising the free Mall Ride down to Writer’s Square with a stop at Rocketfizz, the coolest candy store around.

        Did I mention the mountains? I’m not sure how people in other states tell East from West, but here we have a gorgeous view. Heaps of resorts to choose from to enjoy skiing, snowboarding or tubing. Though it can be pricy for some, every fifth grader in the state is eligible for the Colorado 5th Grade Passport, an amazing program that includes three FREE days to over twenty participating resorts, a great way for every Coloradan to enjoy our winter sports. Fifth grade is right around the corner for my daughter. 🙂

      I may be gushing but I LOVE Denver. I’ve even considered a Denver skyline tattoo, or maybe the state flag. Denver’s rules…. except for one glaring exception- Denver’s pit bull ban. Since 1989, Denver has maintained a controversial twenty year prohibittion on any dog that appears to be more than fifty percent pit bull. This law is breed specific, criminalizing all pit bulls regardless of temperament and frankly I think it’s ridiculous and asinine. Denver has impounded 5,286 dogs under it’s pit bull ordinance. It has been estimated that AT LEAST 3,497 pit bulls have been euthanized under Denver’s ban. It remains the toughest in the nation and the city also has a reputation as the country’s toughest enforcers of this breed specific law.

          One of my very best friends moved out of Denver ten years ago because of this ludicrous ban. Aly and I go way back, all the way back to kindergarten. She rocks and I miss her all the time but she owned a pit bull and Denver made life unbearable for her and her dog, Rocco. It got so bad when police started cracking down that Aly would drive Rocco to Lakewood, a nearby suburb for exercise or she would walk him near her home in Denver late at night, constantly fearing the repercussions. She was chased down by a dog catcher in Washington Park one day, questioning her on her dog’s breed. She was just walking her dog, who was behaving himself perfectly yet she was the criminal. Somehow, she convinced the guy that Rocco was an American Bulldog, probably because weighing in over a hundred pounds, he was bigger than the average pit. Had the dogcatcher determined her dog was illegal, she would have been issued a ticket with a fine and been given a week to prove her dog had relocated out of the city or they would put him to sleep. If she gave them a new address, out of town, these officers would follow up, stopping by the new dog’s new address to verify it was no longer living in Denver. Almost 4,000 dogs were killed, simply for being born stronger and smarter, based on so many false myths and beliefs that some dogs are just born bad instead of the fact that some owners are failures.

            Can you imagine if one day your city decided that orange tabby cats were outlawed because of their viciousness? If thousands of German Shepherds were rounded up and euthanized for the supposed trademarks of their breed? What if Denver decided left-handed people were dangerous?In most households, dogs are members of our family. It’s absurd that one breed was singled out. True, there were several ferocious pit bull attacks and I feel for those victims, but thousands of dogs died because of a few bad owners.

          According to an article in  the Westword written by Jared Jacang Maher , ” Denver has never done an audit of the pit bull ban, never conducted a study of how effective it has been, never established a commission to determine whether one of Denver’s most controversial policies is actually accomplishing what it was created to do.” According to a six-month investigation by Rocky Mountain PBS I-News and 9News, analyzing biting incidents along the Front Range between 2012 and early 2014, Labradors and Lab mixes were most prone to biting but if Denver banned Labradors and started euthanizing people’s pets the city would be in an uproar.

             Aly and Rocco moved to Milwaukee to get away from the stigma of owning a pit bull in Denver, to stop breaking a narrow-minded, biased law. She moved across the country to another city to start a new job with only her best friend Rocco as a companion. Though I worried about her and missed her all the time, I was reassured that Rocco was with her. What fool would mess with a girl walking a 120lb. dog? Seriously?  When I found out last week that Rocco had passed away, I literally burst into tears. I was bawling my eyes out at my son’s basketball practice. HE WASN’T EVEN MY DOG!  but he was the sweetest, kindest boy.  I was devastated for Aly knowing what a gigantic part of her life he was. Rocco was like a son to Aly for almost fourteen years. He had his own Facebook fan page and it wasn’t even a posthumous tribute. He was loved. He was the only friend Aly had when she moved to Milwaukee and even though he was the reason she had to move, he meant everything to her.

            As much as I will always love Denver, this backwards law needs to be overturned. It is 2015 and not only do I not have my hoverboard! I live in a city that ignorantly supports canine racism. Trying to solve a problem as complex as aggressive dog behavior by targeting an entire breed type and criminalizing responsible loving dog owners is unjust and unfair. Please share if you agree. Sign and share the link.

“But mama raised me good,

mama raised me right,

Mama said, “Do what you want,

Say prayers at night.”

-Love Runs Out

One Republic

          This Monday I took a much needed, break from reality, mental health day with one of my oldest friends. (By oldest, I mean friends for twenty plus years not senior citizen material)  We escaped to Breckenridge for a bluebird powder amazing day and I found myself re-inspired and refreshed. On our drive up the mountains, we talked about our similar childhoods and how we’re taking our mother’s tools to parent our own broods. We were both raised by single moms. It was cool to compare how we were both shaped by them.

        For me, growing up in a two bedroom apartment without a bustling family life or tons of spare change, instilled a lot of values I treasure. I knew if I wanted money, a car, or a home, I’d have to work my ass off for it like my Mom did. She was an amazing role model. I had my first job at fifteen after years of babysitting gigs. I graduated high school a semester early with the help of an employment class,actually getting school credit for working. There was no sweet sixteen pink Barbie Jeep waiting for me on my birthday (after several accidents in my Mom’s cars 🙁 ) I saved up my $4.25 an hour paychecks and bought my own first car. I paid for my insurance. I financed my second car with the help of my Grandmother co-signing but none of her money. I put myself through an automotive vocational school and paid off my own student loans.My future husband and I bought our first condo at twenty three, upgrading to our first house at twenty five without the financial  burdens most of our friends had of thousands of dollars in credit cards debt from bar tabs and wardrobes.

         My hookie ski day girlfriend has owned her own business since she was nineteen. She is a leader in professional piercing and in ourcommunity. I think both of us can attribute our successes to the incredible women who raised us. Sure, I was resentful at times to miss out on team sports or summer camp due to funds but growing up without everything handed to me made me an accountable, responsible adult.

         As a mother now, it’s hard for me to not completely spoil my kids. They really want for nothing and I worry someday I’ll have a forty year old son living in my basement. (Maybe even a 40 year old virgin….) When Jameson is whining on the floor about chores,complaining, “My friends don’t have to put their clothes away!” I want to shake him and shout, ” Your friends don’t have a Xbox and a ski pass!” I want my children to understand that not every child has their own room, or more than one pair of shoes to choose from, or “too many” clothes to put away. Not every kid has a Mom AND a Dad, or if they do, the don’t have a “stay at home” parent. I didn’t have cable TV until I was in my twenties paying for it in my own apartment. My bambinos would be aghast at only five channels!

          It’s a fine line I walk between wanting to give my offspring everything I didn’t have and being terrified that they’ll grow into helpless non-adults. I’m sure I already screwed them up by not breastfeeding long enough, allowing too much sugar, television, video games etcetera but my kids do chores, albeit begrudgingly. They will also have jobs, especially if they want their own car to drive. I have friends in their thirties that still haven’t paid for their own health insurance, car insurance, car payments or cell phone bill! I want my kids to be independent whether they learn it from me or in school. It’s crazy to think that of all the things I learned in high school, they never taught us how to balance a checkbook. I could solve for x but they didn’t teach what actual adulthood entails! I know it will probably take a village but I want to insure that my children know how to:

1) Budget and keep track of their money, including how to save up for large item purchases like a car or vacation.

2) Apply for a loan

3) Earn and maintain a good credit score

4) Plan for retirement

5) Have a savings account, in case of emergencies

6) Write a resume, perform well in a job interview, become a valuable employee

7) Obtain and pay for their own insurance and cell phone, including price shopping for the best rates

 8) Clean house- dishes, laundry, yard work, and good personal hygiene ( I’m still working on getting my daughter to change her stinky socks more than once a week!)

9) Cooking-how to make delicious balanced home-cooked meals (though they will have to learn that from my husband since I am terrible in the kitchen)

10) Buy their own car, new or used and learn the best way to maintain their vehicles to get the most out of their investment

11) Perform basic maintenance on theirs vehicles-check fluids, filters, tire pressure, bulbs, etc.

12) Install their spare in case of a flat tire

            I’m sure there are many more I could list but I can certainly help them with the mechanical items. After fifteen years in the automotive industry, I am constantly astounded by people’s lack of car comprehension. I had one customer try to top of her oil by pouring it into her dipstick tube! Another customer yelled at me for turning off his radio to diagnose a suspension noise, ” Now my freaking stereo doesn’t work!”  He’d never pushed the POWER button on his car’s sound system!  I’ve decided to offer a Mamachanic class. Ladies, wouldn’t it be nice to have some general knowledge about the car you’re driving? I know, even as a woman with six ASE certifications, I get tired of being talked down to and made to feel stupid anytime I bring my car in for service. Most things I can do myself in my driveway but when I needed new tires, I dreaded the run around and condescension I was sure to receive from the service writer. I’d like to give a class on how to:

-Check your fluids, oil, brake, power steering, everything

-Change your wiper blades

-Change your bulbs

-Set your tire pressures

-Follow the maintenance schedule for your vehicle

– Install your spare tire in the event of a flat ( AAA is great but the wait time can be upwards of three hours, on bad weather days in particular. Wouldn’t it be nice to drive off on your spare without the wait?)

             Parents, do you have a teenager about to get behind the wheel of your expensive vehicle? Boys used to spend their spare time tinkering in the garage with their fathers, rebuilding classic cars and bonding. These days you’re lucky if your father can help you level up on Halo or Call of Duty. I would have more peace of mind knowing my son or daughter had some insight into the vehicle they’re driving around, specifically in Colorado winters. Men, there’s no shame in confessing you don’t know the difference between four wheel drive and all wheel drive. I may not teach you bumper-to-bumper repair but I can impart some tidbits to assure you on the road, during the next storm, maybe even help you avoid a visit to the service department. Message me for rates if you’re interested in a class in the Denver metro and surrounding areas.

Please feel free to share my post and drive safe out there!

“Everybody knows that the world is full of stupid people…”  Banditos- The Refreshments

“Baby, when I’m yellin’ at you, it’s not your fault, it’s not your fault, yeah”  Not Your Fault -Awolnation

           I didn’t go to the gym at all last week. AT ALL! For someone who tries to go five times a week, that was a major faux pas but the kids were on holiday break and there was plenty of sledding and snowboarding to do for a bit of exercise. I preferred to spend my time hanging out with them instead of dragging them to the Kid’s Club while I work out.

            I’m not going to be one of those people that make a New Year’s fitness resolution. Those people who make the gym completely overcrowded and unbearable through the month of January until they give up and give me back my elliptical and my peace. To read this, you might think I’m one of the health nuts or workout fanatics. After two children and twenty years with my husband, I’ve come to terms with my shape. I joined the gym to lose the baby weight. Now that my “baby” is seven, I’ve given up on a pre-Mommy body. The gym is one of my getaways. I read the entire Twilight series on a recumbent bike. I can thank Stephenie Meyer for helping me shed some extra pounds. Don’t get me wrong, my gym is completely obnoxious. There are always several hot-bodied 20 somethings in full make up. Some tiny testicled steroided fool is always clogging the drinking fountain with snot rockets. There are always two friends who choose the cardio area to catch up, screaming at each other over their treadmills because heaven forbid they take their cackle-fest somewhere appropriate like a coffee shop. Most of my time at the gym is spent with my blood boiling in annoyance but that rage helps to fuel my workouts.

             I go to the gym so I can eat what I want. In my opinion, almost everything tastes better than skinny feels. I had a friend in high school tell me that for every Oreo I ate, I would have to run one mile to burn the calories. Yeah right! Food tastes too good to live by these silly one Oreo=one mile rules, so I’m fine being curvy. To be clear, these days I mostly go to the gym so I can use their showers with never ending high pressure hot water which is pretty gross if you think about it but whatever reason works to get this ever-expanding ass to the gym, I’ll use it.

                I decided my resolution this year would be to work on my temper. I’m not sure if it’s the copious amounts of road rage inducing driving I do for my new job or just a low bullshit tolerance level, but my fuse has shrunk to almost non-existence. My family is bearing the brunt of this. Whether it’s the idiot refusing to pull forward half an inch so I can get my left turn green arrow, the Redbox refusing to accept my return DVD, the Target shopper completely oblivious to the ten item express lane’s functionality, my husband’s nonchalant attitude repeatedly walking past the recyclables on the counter refusing to help them on their journey to the recycle bin, or my cat’s weekly vomits presents usually on my pillow or in my first step out of bed-I’ve found myself in a constant state of agitation. I’m sure I could write an entire blog post on my endless pet peeves.

                I’m hoping continuously seeing red  was just a December holiday insanity symptom. After countless bedtime arguments with the kids ending in shouting matches and snuggle privileges revoked, after record-skipping deja vu feuds with my husband over his phone’s supposed inability to accept my calls or texts , I’ve decided enough. I’m really going  to work on my anger management. In the wise words of some Frozen princess (I’ve only seen the movie once thanks to my daughter’s tomboy tendencies-hallelujah!) I’m going to LET IT GO! Whether I need some deep breaths, a count to ten or my own time out, I’m going to stop snapping at my loved ones or at least try. My waist and thighs may not thank me for this resolution but my family will. What are some of your resolutions? Or pet peeves? 😉